Afterlife
by Tiva-for-life
Summary: Set after S17E02 - Tony finds out Ziva isn't dead. Go through the motions with him and the team as everything processes her return. This is not a TIVA romance story, the genre is friendship, because occasionally I like to write something a little different. Don't read if you're just going to come for me in the comments.
1. Chapter 1

Gibbs was having a hard enough time trying to process the events of the last few days. Never, not in a million years, did he expect to see Ziva again - but there she was, alive and well. But she was different than the Ziva he remembered... she was scarred beyond repair; battling newer, stronger demons. He was standing in the apartment she had used as an after-hours office - apparently for many years - trying to explain to her why he didn't come looking for her.

"I would have lost you a thousand times... if that's what it took." Her voice was filled with emotion - something that only occurred occasionally, when she allowed herself to let down her guard. "I waited for you, Gibbs. I waited, and I waited, and I waited. And you never came."

The truth stung him more than he thought it could. Her eyes, filling with tears, stared deep into his own and in that moment he understood that he had failed her.

"I made a mistake." was all he could manage to say. It was too late now, he couldn't go back and change these events, how things unfolded and how he had reacted. All he could do now was support her in any way she would allow him. "Where to now, Ziva?"

"There's one more thing I have to do before I can put all this behind me. And, this time, I have to do it alone." He wiped away her tears and she tapped his nose with the tip of her finger, smiling softly. Before he could say anything, his phone began to ring - he looked at the caller ID before holding it up so she could read the screen.

"I called him after you went missing, and left a message."

"What did you say?"

"Nothing. He should hear it from you."

"And he will." She turned and walked away, not letting him know when she would tell DiNozzo that she was, in fact, alive.

He let the phone ring out - he could not lie to Tony, or have a casual conversation with him knowing this information. After a few minutes had passed, he dialled the number for his voicemail.

_[Hey Boss, sorry I missed your call. Is everything alright? You seem... I don't know. Just, uh, call me back when you can, I guess.] _

He would have to trust, for now, that Ziva would reach out to Tony sooner, rather than later.


	2. Chapter 2

**So, the first chapter was clearly just to set the scene. Here comes my contribution... enjoy.**

Several weeks had passed since Ziva's return. She had left a phone number with Gibbs, in case if an emergency - but he knew better than to use it if not absolutely necessary. They had eliminated the threat - Sahar was dead - and yet Ziva was still off the grid, scared of something. But that wasn't something for him to concern himself with right now. Ziva had said, whatever she was doing right now was something she needed to do alone. And she wasn't hiding from him anymore, so he was sure that if she did need his help, she would reach out to him.

He looked at the folder on his desk in front of him. He was finding it hard to concentrate on anything right now. Must be the lack of caffeine coursing through his veins. He closed his eyes for a moment, before opening and attempting to refocus them on the words in front of him. Yep, definitely not enough caffeine. He was about to get up and get himself another cup, when his agent's excitement caught his attention.

"Tony?!" Agent McGee said in disbelief as his former team member exited the elevator and walked toward his old desk, where McGee now sat.

"Hey Timmy." He said lovingly. It had been a while since the two had last spoken. Although they annoyed each other, they had bonded like brothers over the years and shared a deep and mutual connection. McGee rose from his desk and gave Tony a heartfelt hug.

"Hey boss." Tony said when he pulled away from McGee.

"I'm not your boss anymore, DiNozzo." Gibbs smiled, before hugging the agent he had seen as a son for many years now. The embrace was not something they did often, but it never felt forced or awkward - in fact, it was something that they both found comfort in.

"What are you doing here?" McGee asked. "And where is Tali?"

"What is this. A game of 21 questions?" Tony joked, before returning his attention to Gibbs. "I was worried about you. I mean, you called me and said you needed to talk, but then you avoid my calls? What's going on?"

McGee looked at his boss anxiously. They both knew that Ziva was planning on being the one to Tell Tony she was still alive... had she not been able to find him? Or had something happened to her? What if she wasn't okay?

"I didn't mean to worry you. I'm sorry you felt the need to fly here to check up on me."

"Now you're apologising? That doesn't really reassure me that everything is fine, boss." Tony searched Gibbs' eyes for answers, despite the fact he had never been able to do so in the past. His boss' cold stare had never faltered. Giving up, he turned to McGee - who was generally much easier to read. His friend avoided eye contact, choosing to settle his glance on his own shoes, instead. "Seriously, guys?"

"McGee," Gibbs opened the top drawer of his desk, pulling out a small piece of paper and holding it out in the direction of his agent, "call... find out how long it would take to get here. Explain the situation."

McGee nodded, walking out from behind the safety of his desk and moving past a very confused Tony. He grabbed the paper off of Gibbs, mumbling a 'yes boss' before walking out of the room.

"How is Tali?"

"She is well." Tony accepted the fact that he was clearly going to have to wait for the answers he had travelled all this way for. "Senior is with her. I didn't want to drag her away from her home unless I had to, you know? It's a long flight for a child."

"Her birthday is soon, right?"

"Yeah, she will be six in just a few months."

"Maybe she can visit, for her birthday?"

"I'm not trying to keep her away. If I had known you wanted a visit, I would have brought her here with me. It's just..." Tony paused for a moment, not knowing how he wanted to proceed with this thought. "It's just hard to be here. Overwhelming, I guess."

"I get that." Gibbs responded. His head was screaming _you just wait_! But he had to proceed with caution. This was an unusual situation, to say the least. DiNozzo was overwhelmed simply by the memory of Ziva David... how was he going to handle seeing her again? Her death was something that took him a long time to come to terms with. This was going to be messy, and Gibbs did not like messy. "I made her something." He walked toward the elevator, giving Tony a 'follow me' gesture. Tony followed without hesitation.

They arrived at their destination after a short drive - Gibbs' house. In the years Tony had been gone, it had not changed at all. That fact seemed to calm Tony, until he walked closer and noticed some small markings along the homes facade.

"It's a long story." Gibbs started, noticing Tony studying what was - until just days ago - bullet holes in the wooden boards of his home. "Nothing out of the usual, though." He had a point, this house did seem to be a hub for all's things bad. Tony had lost count of how many people had been shot here. They walked through the house, down to the basement.

"This seems slightly more than the usual." Tony noted the markings stretched through every room of Gibbs's house - something big went down here.

"The good guys made it out alive."

"I'm not a huge fan of cryptic Gibbs, just so you know."

"I know." Once they were at the bottom of the basement stairs, Gibbs motioned for Tony to sit near the bench, then moved to the end of the room and began digging behind some old boxes. After a few moments he pulled a wooden dollhouse out. It was simple, but stunning. Gibbs had obviously put a lot of time and effort into making this - that thought alone warmed Tony's heart.

"She will love it."

"I was going to get it shipped to you, but it's heavy so it's going to cost... you can probably buy one for less." He placed the house on the workbench, where Tony could examine it more closely.

"I'll pay. I don't care what it costs, this is better than anything I could get her in a store. Thank you, boss."

Gibbs' phone began to ring. He looked at the caller ID - McGee. "Yeah."

Tony couldn't quite hear the other side of the conversation, and his former boss' occasional 'yeah' and 'okay' really didn't give him much information.

"Meet at mine." Gibbs hung up the phone and returned his attention to Tony. "Drink?" He asked, before walking over to the bottle of whiskey he kept under his workbench.

"If you think I'll need it." Gibbs smiled and poured two glasses.

Roughly fifteen minutes had passed before they heard someone enter the house above them. Tony looked at the figure as they came to the top of the basement stairs. He did not recognise this person.

"DiNozzo, this is Jack Sloane. Jack, meet DiNozzo."

As the figure walked down the stairs, she held out a hand to greet Tony. "Hi. It's nice to finally meet you." She smiled, big. Tony was not used to this kind of enthusiasm in Gibbs' basement. This was a solemn place, didn't she know? Of course she knew... Tony may have left NCIS before she came but he had heard all about Sloane and just how close she and Gibbs had become. He reached out, shaking her hand.

"It is nice to meet you too."

"I'm not staying. I just wanted to introduce myself." She gave Gibbs a look that, apparently, exchanged a lot of information. Gibbs nodded his head, yes he understood the message. Loud and clear, as they say. The front door opened again.

"Looks like you're here for the show." Gibbs said, before adjusting on his stool. He instantly became notably uncomfortable.

"Boss, we're here." McGee called from the top of the stairs. He began walking down, smiling awkwardly at Tony. He was about halfway down when another figure approached. Tony's attention shifted to the person at the top of the stairs - and he stared with disbelief as that person began their descent to the basement.


	3. Chapter 3

**I do not own NCIS. We would have had a much better Tiva reunion if i did! Anyways, enjoy.**

Tony could not form a single thought - when he saw her, standing there in the very same room that he was in, his heart began to race. Adrenaline kicked in, full force, and it was as if he could no longer sit still... he had to move. He stood, beginning to walk toward her, before coming to a sudden holt - what was happening? Confusion stepped up, taking place of the adrenaline. He stepped back, forcing himself to look away. Surely he was imagining things. Ziva David was dead. He looked at the ground momentarily, before looking to Gibbs for clarity. Gibbs face was no longer cold, but instead he seemed to be... hurting? Tony looked at Jack, who seemed to be studying him as if he had the answers - of course, she's a shrink. The last thing he needed right now was to get his head shrunk. Finally, he looked at McGee, who seemed to be the most optimistic of all. He gave Tony a soft, encouraging smile - enough to tell tony that this was, in fact, real. He looked back to Ziva, who was now beside McGee at the bottom of the stairs.

"It wasn't mean to happen like this. I am sorry." Ziva said, not sure whether it was a good idea for her to come any closer. She desperately wanted to touch him, hold him - she had been waiting for this moment for years now - but his needs were more important than her own at the moment. His face was expressionless for what felt like forever, before an expression Ziva was all too familiar with formed. He was hurting, because of her.

"Sorry for what, exactly?" He spat out. Before he even realised what he was saying, it all came out like verbal diarrhoea. "Because it seems, to me, that you have quite a bit to be sorry for. Are you sorry for breaking my heart? Absolutely shattering me and making me question absolutely everything? Because you did that when you told me you loved me but not enough to come back to the states with me. Or are you sorry for not informing me of the fact that you were having my baby?" The words spilled out uncontrollably. He could see her eyes becoming glassy from tears, but he couldn't stop himself.

"All of it." She softly whimpered.

"I would have been there, Ziva. For all of it. I had a right to know!"

"I know." She said, sharper than before.

"I had no warning! They were telling me you were dead and before I even had a chance to process, let alone grieve for you, they hand me this small, vulnerable child who has just lost everything she knows and telling me I am now responsible for making her feel safe and loved. I had no idea how to comfort her. When she woke up in the night, crying for her Ima, not wanting to be held by someone who is a complete stranger to her - despite your efforts to teach her that I am her father. So, thank you for that part, I guess." His expression softened - he was less angry now, and more concerned. "What happened?"

"It is a long story, Tony. Do you need all the details right now?" She was clearly exhausted. But she knew he needed some sort of explanation. It was the very least she could do for him, after everything.

"The cliffs notes?"

"I couldn't risk putting Tali in harms way. Someone was after me, they wanted me dead and after the bombing, we saw an opportunity and we took it. It nearly killed me to have to leave Tali but I knew you could keep her safer than I could. As for not telling you about her before..." she paused, "I made a mistake. I made a hasty decision out of fear and I regretted it almost instantly. But the more time that passed, the harder it got to tell you until, eventually, it was too late. Everyone thought I was dead. And trust me, I would not have kept it that way unless I felt it absolutely necessary."

"And now?"

"There is no threat. I do not have to hide anymore."

"If there is no danger, why didn't you come to me? I assume you've known where we have been this whole time... why didn't you reach out?" He took several steps forward, but made sure not to get too close. Despite his anger, there was a huge part of him that just wanted to wrap his arms around her - partly to make sure this was actually real.

"I had help. My contact managed to get close to Sahar's trusted contacts - he warned me that she was coming for Gibbs and by coming here, I exposed him."

Realisation crossed Tony's face - that must have been the cause of the destruction in the house. The amount of bullet markings was astonishing, and that was after Gibbs had 'cleaned up'. The severity of the attack dawned on him - whoever was after Ziva must have sent a lot of man power after Gibbs. It was lucky they both got out of here alive.

"I have been trying to locate him. To make sure he is... well, alive. But I have been unsuccessful and I fear the worst. I, more than likely, got him killed." Ziva couldn't keep her emotions at bay, and tears began to run down her cheeks. She wiped them away as quickly as they appeared.

"That's what you've been handling?" Gibbs asked. "Our resources at NCIS could have made this a whole lot easier for you."

"This is not your problem, Gibbs. You have already been dragged into this too far."

"You don't have to do this alone. Accept the help, you need it." Tony and Ziva stared into each other's eyes, neither one of them wanting to be the first to break eye contact. She knew he was right, she needed the help. "If you'll excuse me, I need to make a phone call." He dug into his pocket, pulling out his cellphone before pushing past her and making his way up the stairs.

Conversation between Gibbs, McGee and Ziva continued as he exited the basement. He needed a moment to himself to gather his thoughts. He couldn't think straight, he didn't know what to feel - his heart started to race again and it felt as thought the world started spinning faster than his body could handle. He had to sit down, now. He sunk down into the curb of the road, resting himself on Gibbs' lush lawn. He unlocked his phone and began to dial the first number on his speed dial.


	4. Chapter 4

"Junior, how was the flight?" Senior's voice echoed through his phone. His voice had become more of a comfort than it was a decade ago. They had both worked hard on repairing their relationship, and they were both incredibly proud of how far they had come.

"I need you to get on the next flight here." He replied, ignoring his fathers' question.

"Everything okay?" He questioned.

"Ziva..." was all Tony managed to get out before his voice broke, the emotions he couldn't quite sort breaking through. It took everything in him to not cry. It had been a long time since he had felt this overcome.

"I'll pack Tali's bag and be on the next flight out. I'll let you know once it's all confirmed and we are on our way." Senior didn't need an explanation. He had watched his son fall apart when his colleagues showed up on his doorstep to confirm that the woman he was in love with was dead. In the time since then, he had grown into the role of 'dad' and Senior had never been more proud of his son... but he had always wondered when things would fully hit him. He never got the chance to fully grieve his lost love, as he was thrust into looking after Tali so quickly. "Whatever is going on, son... it will be alright." He said, optimistically. And he believed it would be so.

"Love you, dad. Give Tali extra hugs for me." Tony said before ending the call. He felt someone's presence behind him. He rose up from the ground and turned to see Gibbs waiting patiently.

"Did ya tell him?" Gibbs asked.

"Not yet. I don't really think it's a phone conversation, ya know? I guess you understand that." He pushed his phone back into the pocket of his pants, trying to avoid Gibbs' gaze momentarily.

"There's no manual for this kind of thing. Just do what feels right - you call the shots from here on out."

"It doesn't feel like it." Tony admitted. "Am I a terrible person for not just being happy that she's alive? Because I feel like I'm a terrible person."

Gibbs shook his head, reassuringly.

"Don't get me wrong, I _am _happy to see her... I'm just, I don't know... every other emotion too. And it's all just getting mixed in together and I guess the happiness is getting a little lost."

"That's fine. You gotta get through this in your way. Just don't let the negatives win, because you've got that little girl to think about and she doesn't need a dad that's spiralling."

"Yeah." Tony scoffed. "No pressure or anything."

"What do you need? Right now, what do you need?"

"Honestly, I need to clear my head."

"Go." Gibbs handed Tony a folded slip of paper, then headed back inside. Tony put the slip in his pocket and headed to his hotel.

Once there, he pulled the piece of paper from his pocket. Scrawled in a near unreadable handwriting was a cellphone number and the words 'just in case'. He tossed the paper to the side and walked to the mini bar fridge, grabbing the first beverage his hand landed on. The whiskey he had shared with Gibbs earlier on in the day was definitely not enough to get him through this. A clear head was probably more beneficial to him right now but at this point he really could not care less. He had too many thoughts running through his mind, he just needed a little something to quiet the noise. His phone buzzed as it vibrated in his pocket.

"Yeah," he answered.

"Junior, we are all packed and headed to the airport. I have us booked on the next flight, I'll email you through the details. But in less than twelve hours, your little princess will be in your arms."

Senior was always an optimist, there was no denying that. Tony remembered back to when his father was helping him pack his bags for Tel Aviv...

"_It's going to be fine, Junior. You do know that, right."_

"_No, actually, I don't." _

"_Well, I guess it's better to be prepared... but... I've got this feeling..."_

"_Feeling that she's still alive? So do I. But I don't know that she's still alive. And no one knows anything so what's the point in feeling anything at all?" _

He often found himself reliving that moment... wishing that 'feeling' had been right. And now... it was. All along, that nagging feeling he had, that something wasn't right. That feeling he just couldn't shake... but then he would remember his friends... Abby... how she looked so broken, yet so focussed. Focussed on making sure _he_ would be okay. Everyone was so... _sure_.

"Is there anything you need, son? Anything at all that I can do for you before we board?" Seniors voice brought Tony back to reality.

"No, I am fine. I just need some sleep, I guess. I will see you both soon."

"Say goodbye daddy..." senior sung from the other end of the line. And then he heard it - the sweet, melodic sound of his little girl echoing what her grandfather had said.

"Goodbye daddy." She sung, in a similar tune to Senior. "I love you." She added.

"I love you too, princess." Tony replied, before the line cut out.

He put down his phone and closed his eyes, finally allowing everything his body was holding in so tightly to come out all at once. He screamed into the emptiness of his hotel suite, before falling back onto the bed and fighting the tears so desperately trying to run from his eyes. Ziva coming back into his life was all he had dreamed about since the day he left her in Israel. And even more so since the news of her death reached NCIS. But reality was so much more complicated than those dreams. He had put so much time and effort into explaining to Tali that she would not be able to see her Ima again... not in this lifetime, anyway. How is he supposed to take that all back now? He sat up again and opened the bottle in his hand.

"I will not get drunk," he told himself. "I just need to take the edge off." He took a swig from the bottle. Then another... and another. And when the buzz finally started to settle in, he reached for his phone and the hastily discarded slip of paper, dialling the numbers without a second thought.


	5. Chapter 5

Ziva stood staring at the crisp, white wooden door in front of her. Seeing Tony earlier today had not gone well, to put it lightly. So it was rather surprising when he called her, just hours after, and told her he wanted to talk. She scribbled the address of his hotel down on the back of her hand and rushed off as quickly as possible, but now that she was here, she was feeling rather anxious. She had managed to keep her anxiety in check for the time being, but she wasn't sure what was waiting for her on the other side of this door and she found that quite unsettling. Just as she was working up the courage to knock, the door flung open and she found herself face-to-face with a rather tired looking Tony.

"I was going to wait for you to knock but you've been standing out here for a while now. Are you okay?" He said. He stood to one side, motioning for her to come in. She did so, looking around and taking in her surroundings. She noted the near-empty bottle of bourbon on the coffee table.

"I was not sure on how to proceed. Should I be preparing myself for more anger?" She quipped.

"I'm sorry, how was I supposed to react to seeing my dead..." he paused for a moment, trying to read her expression but she gave him nothing. "I don't even know. What are you to me? I think that's the part I need to figure out right now." He wasn't slurring his words, or showing any signs of intoxication for that matter, but she knew if she were to get close enough she would be able to smell it on his breath.

"This might take a while... mind if I catch up?" She walked over to the bottle of bourbon, tapping the table it sat on gently with her foot.

"Be my guest."

She lifted it, bringing it to her lips and taking a swig. It was stronger than she had anticipated - although, it had been a long time since she had consumed an alcoholic beverage... perhaps her senses had developed a lower tolerance. She couldn't help but clench her jaw.

"Yeah, it's the good stuff." Tony explained, before taking the bottle from her and having a sip. He was standing closer to her than he dared to earlier in the day.

"I cannot catch up, if you continue to drink." She grabbed the bottle back from him, her hand grazing his in the process - testing the waters, as Tony may say. And this move was not lost on him. As she sipped from the bottle, he took a step closer. She could feel the heat of his body, just inches away from her own. His breath, warm on her face. This kind of exchange was familiar for them, they had spent years pushing on that line, daring each other to cross it.

"What are you to me?" He said soft and slow.

"That is not something I can decide for you, Tony." She finished the bottle and placed it back on the table. Tony nodded in agreement, then turned from her and walked away. As the heat from his body drifted away and the cool air swirled in to replace it, the light buzz from the bourbon kicked in.

"Wouldn't it be nice if we could just pretend this never happened?" Tony mused. "We could live happily ever after, in our own little world."

It felt, to Ziva, as if he was taunting her; talking about the one thing she wanted more than anything else as if it were an impossible dream.

"I know that this is not something that will sort itself out overnight, Tony. But we have a child together... we need to be working toward... something!"

"You think I've forgotten about Tali?" His words, angry. "There has not been a moment, since the day I met her, that I have not been thinking about her and what is best _for her_."

"I do not doubt that. Over the years I have seen, firsthand, how wonderful of a father you are to her. I have no doubt in my mind that she is your first priority." Her voice was calming as she began to walk closer to him, once again. She placed her hand, gently on his arm. "I am not asking for a clean slate, Tony. All I ask is that you try to find it in your heart... try to forgive me enough to allow me to be a part of my daughters life."

He could hear the slight tremor in her voice. Was she really worried that he would keep Tali from her, forever? Sorrow filled his heart - of course, after so long, this would be her main concern. He wrapped his arms around her body and held her close. She instantly moved her hands around his waist and rested her head on his shoulder. The embrace was meant to simply comfort her and reassure her - but with his face now buried in the nape of her neck, the scent of her wild curls filling his nose, he was suddenly overcome with an all to familiar _want_. The stir in his stomach grew strong as he tightened his hold on her. She complied with his silent request, shifting slightly within his grasp to push her body closer against his. She lifted her head, facing her gaze toward his. They stared intently for a moment, both of them trying to find words to break the silence. Finally, Tony succumbed to the fact that there were no words deemed worthy for right now. He leaned in, closing the distance between the pair. When their lips met, he remembered the bittersweet time they shared together in Israel. He was not sure how it was possible for something to feel so wrong, yet so incredibly right at the same time. This was definitely not what he had planned when he called her - but he could not find the strength to stop. He placed his hand on the back of her head, feeling her hair curl around his fingertips.

Was it wise to make this tomorrow's problem?


	6. Chapter 6

**So... someone has already figured out where the story is headed! Thank you to everyone who had favourited or reviewed - it's such a confidence boost.**

**Again, I don't own NCIS, I'm just musing here... enjoy. **

Ziva's better judgement kicked in - they were both overwhelmed by their current situation and the shared bottle of bourbon would not be their friend tonight. She pulled away from Tony's embrace, not sure if she would regret the decision or not. She tried to read his expression, but failed to find even the slightest hint of emotion - nothing.

"Sorry." Was all Tony managed to say.

"Tony, I..." she hesitated for a moment, not knowing if proceeding with this train of thought was in the best interest of both parties, "I still love you... more than anything, that is what I know for sure. But, like you, I want to do what is best for Tali."

"And us making hasty decisions out of confusion is definitely not what's best for her." He finished her thought. There was silence, for a good few minutes while the both of them contemplated where to go from here. Tony broke the silence. "I don't want her to see you."

She felt a tight pinch in her chest as she studied his face for any sign that he was joking. She could feel her stomach sinking as the realisation that he was very serious set in. She had told herself that she would respect whatever decision he made - but it was going to be difficult to respect this one.

"Not right now, I mean." His clarification made her feel lighter. "Senior and I have been very delicately trying to explain to her the concept of death... and she's really only just started to grasp the fact that you were gone... you know, not coming back."

"I understand."

"I just, you know... I can't just be like 'yeah just kidding, Ima is right here'. I mean, I have no idea how she is going to react or even if she is going to _want _to see you - no offence."

The thought of her daughter not wanting to see her stung, but Ziva understood. "No offence taken."

"Give me the weekend. Her and Senior are on there way here now, I'll give her a day to rest up and then I will talk to her."

"I appreciate that." Silence filled the room once more. "So... I guess this is it, for now."

"I guess it is." He agreed.

Ziva tried to think of anything else, any reason at all to stay. "Goodnight, Tony." She surrendered. As she walked toward the door, she noticed that Tony seemed to be internally battling with something.

"I've been seeing someone." Ziva stopped, not game to face him and show him the emotions that would be so obviously plastered all over her face. "Nothing serious... not yet anyway. And, I guess, after I talk to her tonight she might not want to stick around for this... complication. But I thought you should know." Ziva simply nodded, before walking out the door.

Alone, once again, the temptation to grab another bottle from the mini bar was all too real. But tony resisted temptation, choosing instead to try and get some sleep. Tali would be arriving in several hours and he didn't want to be intoxicated upon her arrival.

He tossed and turned for far too long to allow him to get sufficient rest. When he heard the quiet knock on the door, it was early hours of the morning and still quite dark. He sluggishly got out of bed and dragged himself to the door. There stood Senior, looking rather exhausted, holding a sleeping Tali. Her arms were thrown casually over her grandfathers shoulders, legs wrapped around his waist and head tucked tightly against his neck. Tony soaked in the sight of his daughter so peaceful. There was something so calming about the sight of a sleeping child. Tony stepped aside and pointed in the direction of the bed he had just dragged himself out of, allowing Senior to enter and place Tali in the still warm spot. As he tucked her in, Tony grabbed the luggage from the bell boy and tipped him generously. Once the suitcases were put away and Tali was tucked comfortably into bed, the two Tony's sat together on the couch.

"What's going on, son?" Senior asked, quietly and cautiously.

"You're exhausted, dad. You should try to get some sleep before Tali wakes up."

"You really think I'm going to sleep, not knowing what is going on? First, you rush off to NCIS without telling me anything and then you get us on the next flight and, once again, you don't tell me anything... only that this has something to do with..." he looks behind him, to make sure Tali is still sleeping peacefully, and then lowers his voice, "Ziva."

Tony thought for a moment. "I guess, if I tell you now that will give you time to process before I have to tell Tali." He concluded.

Senior wasn't willing to wait for his son to continue in his own time, "tell Tali what?" He pressed.

"That her mother is alive."

Tony watched each expression cross Senior's face as he let this news sink in. Now may have been an odd time for this realisation, but he saw the resemblance that everyone had talked about since he was a young boy. He recognised this thought process.

"You saw her?"

"Yes."

"Did she give you an explanation?"

"Kind of. I don't need the details, I don't think they will change anything. I mean, I know she would never have left Tali if she didn't feel it was absolutely necessary. And what she did in that time means very little to me, really."

"Are you sure about that, son?" Senior asked, although it was more 'knowing' than anything.

"No, I'm really not sure of anything." Once again, Tony's eyes began to tear up. If he was going to let the tears fall, it was going to be in front of his father - right here, right now - not in front of Tali. He attempted to blink the tears away, and for now he was successful. "I'm angry. And I don't want to be angry... but I just can't figure out how to move on from that. Everything I have gone through, all the pain... she did that. It was the choices she made that completely turned my life upside down."

Senior didn't say anything, instead he leaned over and held his son. This action lead to Tony finally letting the tears fall. He let out several sobs, lost into his fathers' shoulder, before pulling himself together.

"I'm so scared for Tali. How is this going to affect the rest of her life? It was bad enough having a dead mother... but now a mother who was never actually dead? That's gotta mess with her head... right?"

"I guess we will find out. Together. You're not alone in this, son." His fathers words were reassuring. But he was going to need more than reassuring words to get him through this.


	7. Chapter 7

**Just a little bit of filler, right here, while I try to get my thoughts to come out a little more coherently. I figured you might want to know a little bit about the woman DiNozzo has been seeing. **

**Thank you everyone for the love so far. I'm trying to get it all out as quick as possible so you don't have to wait forever.**

**Enjoy xx **

Tony woke, his back stiff from the few hours sleep he managed to get on the couch, to the sound of Tali and Senior giggling merrily in the kitchenette. He rubbed his eyes, trying to clear his vision, and lifted his head slightly to get a better view of his family. Senior was trying - and failing - to helpTali flip a pancake. Tony noted that they were both quite messing, considering they were only making a simple pancake.

"Need help?" He asked, clearing his throat after hearing his groggy voice.

"Daddy!" Tali cheered, jumping down off the stool she had been kneeling on, running over to Tony. She jumped onto the couch were he was rested and threw her arms around him. "Me and grandpa got to go on a plane! And he let me watch lots of movies."

"Wow, I bet that fun." Tony enjoyed the hug his daughter was giving him for as long as he could. It wasn't long before she began to pull away and go back to her culinary adventure. "How about, when we finish breakfast, we all get ready for a day of fun adventures?" He asked, to which Tali cheered excitedly. He really did love how enthusiastic she was about everything. "Daddy can show you all the great stuff from when he lived here!" Tali cheered again.

Ziva walked into the bullpen, bright and early the next morning. She was thankful Gibbs' team had agreed to help her find her contact - she couldn't afford to be alone right now, because being alone meant thinking about Tony. Undoubtedly, Tali would be with him by now. It took all her self control to not go to the hotel to try and sneak a look at her daughter. It had been so long since she had done so... she was sure Tali would be a whole foot taller by now. She walked over to the next where she had sat for many years. Across from her was Tony's desk. She was aware that McGee was there now... but she was always know it to be Tony's desk. The pair had shared many longing stares while seated at these desks. But that was just a distant memory now... Tony was seeing someone.

"Good morning, Ziva." Ellie Bishop's voice broke Ziva from her thoughts. She looked to see Bishop and Torres entering the bullpen. She smiled, to the best of her ability.

"Ziva. MTAC." Gibbs called from above.

Ziva had to practically run up the stairs to catch up. As they entered the secured room, she notice that McGee and director Vance were already in there and on a call. The man on the screen, talking to Vance, looked familiar but Ziva could not quite place him. She smiled and nodded, acknowledging McGee, as she walked past.

Vance signalled to cut the call, before turning and greeting Ziva. "Welcome back, Agent David." He noticed his error before Ziva had a chance to correct him. "Sorry, old habit."

"How can I help you, sir?" She asked, nervously.

"It is a matter of how I can help you. I may have the location of Adam Eshal." He stated, rather proudly. Ziva was taken aback. She had not disclosed to anyone the identity of her contact and yet they had possibly found him - something she had been unable to do - in a little over fourteen hours.

"I figured, if you were going to trust anyone, it was going to be him." McGee explained, seeing the confusion on her face. "He was smart - he must have known that you would turn to us if you needed help. Your old badge number flagged in the system - it was included in a crime scene report from a few days after the attack at Gibbs'. I pulled the file, got the footage from evidence and found..." with a few taps on the keyboard, he brought a photograph up onto the screen.

Ziva looked up, her eyes already watering. There he was, alive and well, in the crowd of onlookers at an NCIS crime scene.

"I looked at security footage from the area and there seems to be a fair bit of after hours activity going on in the area." McGee continued, before realising she wasn't really listening. "Well, the how isn't really all that important I guess... I tracked him to this warehouse." He scrawled an address on the notepad in front of him and handed it to Gibbs'. As Gibbs and Ziva walked out, Vance gave him 'the nod', signalling that McGee was free to leave MTAC.

As he got back to his desk, he turned his phone back on - despite knowing that no one else did, he's till chose to follow the 'no cellphones in MTAC' rule - and noticed he had a missed call from Tony. He pressed the dial for voicemail and held his phone to his ear.

'_Hey uncle Timmy!' _McGee smiled, recognising Tali's voice. '_Daddy said I can ask you to have lunch with us. Please say yes! Please, please, please!' _The recording stopped suddenly... Tali had hung up. McGee dialled Tony's number and pressed the phone back against his ear.

"Hey Tony." He said when he heard his friend answer the call. He checked the time, quickly, before continuing. "I can't do lunch but I've got some time now if you wanted me to meet you somewhere." He suggested.

"Sounds great, Tim. We were just about to head to Stead Park."

"I'll meet you there." He disconnected the call and packed up his stuff, heading toward the elevator. "Be back later." He called to his fellow team members as he left. They knew better than to question things right now, so they just continued on with their paperwork.

The park was quiet, which was unusual for this time of day. McGee had brought the twins here on several occasions and there were usually kids everywhere. He saw Tony and his father sitting on a bench on the other side of the park. He made his way over, and had made it almost half way there before he heard little Tali's voice:

"Uncle Timmy!" She squealed, excitedly before flinging herself off the swing she was on. She ran toward him, throwing herself into his arms once she was close enough. McGee hadn't seen Tali since the day she first came into their lives, so her confidence around him truely astonished him. Tony did make an effort to video call him as often as possible, and in the past years Tali had become quite infatuated with the twins. "Are Morgan and John gonna come play?"

"They can't come play right now but I'm sure they would love to see you sometime soon."

"Daddy, can we go and play with my cousins?" She asked Tony as he walked over to them. "Please, daddy?"

"We have plenty of time to see them, kiddo. Keep playing because we can't stay for long." Tail rushed off, back to the swing set. "Thanks for joining us." Tony said once they were alone. The two walked through the park together, leaving Senior behind to supervise Tali.

"How are you holding up?" McGee has been concerned about his former partners current mental state. He himself had been struggling with Ziva's return - and he wasn't nearly as connected to her as Tony had once been... and maybe still was? He was positive that his friend would need someone to vent his thoughts to.

"I think I'm doing alright." Tony offered, not sure if he wanted to go into it too much with his daughter in such close proximity. "I'm still not really sure on what I'm supposed to tell her, you know?"

"If I knew, I'd tell you. I couldn't imagine..." he began, before realising Tony didn't need his pity right now. "Well, if you need anything from me - anything at all - I'm here."

"I appreciate that, McSuck-up."

The playful nickname was Tony's way of hinting he no longer wanted to continue with this conversation. McGee was curious to know exactly what Tony's plan was... but he knew better than to push. He continued on with smaller, less weighted conversation, knowing Tony would return to the topic of Ziva when he was good and ready. They discussed NCIS at length. Tony quite often found himself missing the work. But he was enjoying his new life, too. His new role as a father was honestly one of the most fulfilling things he had ever done. He was enjoying living abroad, too. There was so much to learn in Paris and he and Tali enjoyed learning together. Tony began telling McGee a story about one of their visits to their favourite museum...

"That's actually where I met Katie. She was so taken by how infatuated Tali was by the 'La Fée Electricité'. We spent over an hour just sitting there while Tali took in every part of it. She looked so tiny, staring up at this artwork that just seemed to never end."

McGee had known about Katie's presence in Tony and Tali's life, but he hadn't considered how she was going to fit into this messy equation. Tony has shared with McGee, many months ago, that he saw himself falling for this woman. Had he? Had he moved on from Ziva and all the hurt that he held on to? He hadn't heard anything more after that conversation - but they hadn't really talked much since Ziva returned.

"Where is Katie at the moment?" McGee asked, recalling the fact that she travelled a lot for work.

"She's in Australia, visiting her family. She'll be in New York on Thursday before heading off to Japan for a week, then back to Melbourne. She doesn't know I'm here, actually, but I'm hoping to maybe drive up to see her." Tony couldn't hide the anxious undertones in his voice. Clearly, he wasn't sure how Katie was going to fit into this messy equation either. "I'm used to not seeing her for a while. I mean, that's why we keep things at a distance, right? But all this chaos in my head... it just makes me realise how easy things are with her." He continued, offering McGee the little bit of insight he was craving. McGee nodded his head, agreeing that things between Tony and Ziva did always seem... not easy. There were just too many complications.

"Are you going to tell her?" McGee verbalised the thought without really meaning to.

"I'm going to have too." Tony couldn't help but smile at his friends small blunder. "I'm doing this new thing where I'm just completely open and upfront in my relationships. A big part of why things were so complicated with Zee was because we both tried to deny it all for so long, I guess. And Katie is super into transparency and I was really trying to impress her so I started the honesty thing and I'm just trying to stick with it. She knows all about... well, everything. I even told her about Jeanne - so telling her about falling in love with a colleague felt a hell of a lot easier. But I can't just pretend nothing is going to change now."

"If you want us to watch Tali, I'm sure Delilah will be alright with that. The kids would love to have a sleepover with her."

"Thanks. I think Tali would love that too." With that, they headed back to where Tali and Senior were and parted ways.


	8. Chapter 8

_Tali was smart... smarter than any five year old he had known before. Granted, he didn't know all that many five year olds, but he remembered Junior at a young age and he definitely did not have her level of intelligence. She was a quiet achiever - proud of the things she did, but she didn't crave the attention. She was an old soul, for sure. Some may see this as damage... a little girl who was forced to grow up after the death of her mother. But Senior knew this wasn't the case, for Tali was just a little girl who enjoyed the simpler things in life. _

Senior sat back in the oversized armchair of the hotel room, watching Tali dance around the room. Tali has taken up ballet dancing when she was just three years old - and in Senior's humble opinion, she would be performing on the worlds' biggest stages in no time.

Quite often, Tony would watch her as she practiced her ballet and think to himself how proud he imagined Ziva would have been if she could see her daughter dancing. He would think about a young Ziva... the Ziva who longed to be a ballerina when she grew up. Did she look just like Tali does now - prancing around the room without a care in the world. From the hotel rooms kitchenette, he watched his father enthralled in Tali's playful dance. His father loved Tali from the moment he laid eyes on her and that love had only grown stronger over time. The two were best of friends and practically inseparable - you know, when they were in the same country. Tony was glad that his father was here right now.

"I've booked us a bigger suite." Tony stated as he brought a fresh cup of coffee over to his father.

"I was thinking this room was going to be a little small for the three of us." Senior grabbed the coffee from Tony's grasp and placed it gently on the coffee table in front of him. "Tali, darling - you will have to stop for a little bit. There is hot coffee around and I'd hate to see it get knocked over."

"Okay, Pa." the words melted his heart every time. "Daddy, can I draw Uncle Gibbs a picture?" She asked, turning her attention toward Tony.

"I think Gibbs would love that." Tony replied. He moved to where the suitcases were piled, pulling a sketch pad and some pens out of one. He set Tali up with everything she needed before heading back to the living area and sitting on the couch across from his father and sipping on his own coffee.

"Today's the day?" Senior asked softly.

"Yep."

"How are we doing this?"

"No idea. I figure..." Tony paused. What did he figure? He had spent most of the night, tossing and turning, thinking of how to start this conversation with Tali and yet he still had no idea how to proceed. "I figure... I do it now. We take the whole day, if she needs, to just answer any questions she has. And that's all I've got... I don't know what I'm going to say. I guess I'm just going to rip the bandaid and wait for the reaction... and then just be there."

"I think that's the best plan of action, son. You can plan this down to every last detail but there's no telling how she will react and how it will play out. You've got a strong paternal instinct - trust it." His fathers support has become invaluable over the years.

They finished their coffees before calling Tali into the room. The three of them sat down at the dining table.

"Did I do something wrong?" Tali asked, sensing the tension in the room.

"No, sweetheart, you didn't." Senior chimed in before Tony had the chance.

"We just wanted to talk to you. We want to talk about Ima." He started gently.

"I was just thinking about Ima." She pushed herself off of the chair she was sitting on and ran over to her suitcase. She dug around in her belongings for a moment before pulling something out and running back over, sitting back across from her father. On the table in front of them, she placed a photograph of herself and Ziva. "I brought the picture with me so I could still say goodnight every night." She continued with a smile.

Tony placed a finger on the corner of the photograph and spun it on the table, so that he was looking at it the right way up. He loved this photo of Ziva, holding a very newly born Tali. He couldn't help but smile at the sight. That sweet moment was soon interrupted, however. Before he knew it, the smile was gone and instead he felt something he hadn't felt while looking at this particular picture before - he felt the anger that had been settling in the pit of his stomach for the last few days rise up once more. He could have been there for this picture. He could have held Tali as a newborn - known her and watched her grow. He was surprised by the new emotion this image now bought to him. He spun the image back to how his daughter had placed it down and forced himself to look away. He hadn't cared about any of this before, when Ziva was dead. So why did it matter now?

"Do you want to start, daddy?"

They had many discussions about Ziva over the years. Tony did not want Tali to forget her. They generally started with Tony sharing a fun, lighthearted memory about the woman he loved. He searched his memory for a story, any story. Just some lighthearted fluff about how amazing the mother of his child was. It didn't have to be anything spectacular, just something to make the little girl in front of him smile.

"I remember the first time I met your mother." Senior started, noticing Tony's apparent brain freeze. "I was visiting your father at work but he didn't want me to meet the people he worked with..."

Tony was relieved that Senior took over leading the discussion. And for now, Tali seemed fascinated by the story he was telling her. The story lasted just long enough for Tony to pull himself together. Tali asked several questions about Seniors first impressions of her mother and listened intently to his answers.

"You remember what I told you, don't you? About where Ima is..." he began to trail off., encouraging Tali to speak.

"Ima is in the afterlife. We can't see her but she is always in our hearts."

"Well... daddy made a mistake." He started, watching her face ever so carefully so that he did not miss any tiny part of her reaction.

"Daddy, you don't make mistakes. You're a grown up!" She giggled.

"Unfortunately, beautiful..." he reached out across the table and rested his hand on top of hers. "Sometimes grown ups make mistakes, too."

The sweet smile on her face faded and was replaced with the slightest glow of disbelief. He felt himself falling from the pedestal his daughter had placed him on. She had always blindly trusted the things that he told her and he really hoped this wouldn't change that.

"Do you remember when you lost Mr. Squeak?" Tony asked her, recalling the night he walked the streets searching for Tali's pink velvet ferret toy. "And daddy told you that maybe he got married and moved in with his new wife?" He gently reminded her.

"But he didn't go live with his new wife. I accidentally left him in Pa's suitcase and he went on the aeroplane with Pa. You made a mistake then, too." Tali recalled the event well, as Tony expected. She had been distraught over the disappearance of Mr. Squeak for a week before Senior found him and mailed him back to them. "Is Ima lost?" She asked, concerned.

The good thing about the afterlife was that there was nothing bad there. Tony had explained that to Tali that Ima was never cold, or scared, or lonely. In the afterlife, Ima was surrounded by family and friends; including her sister, whom Tali was named after. In the afterlife, only good things happened. Everyone was happy, safe and at peace.

Tali's mind raced with what her Ima being lost may have meant. Did this mean that she was not happy, or safe, or at peace? Was she cold, scared and lonely?

"Ima is alright, Tali."

"Where is she? Is she going to be sent back to us?"

"She is with Gibbs." Tony explained.

Tali's eyes sparkled with happiness. "So she isn't lonely." She was relieved. Tony let out the breath he didn't notice he was holding.

"No, baby, she isn't lonely. But she sure does miss you - a lot!" He squeezed the tiny hand he was still holding.

"Can I draw Ima a picture?" She asked excitedly, running off before Tony could give her an answer. She pulled out the left over paper from before and started scribbling away eagerly.

"So far so good." Senior commented.

"It's the 'so far' part that I'm worried about."


	9. Spoiler! For those who wanted one

**Spoiler alert! if you are happy to continue reading the story then skip this chapter! **

I have had a few reviews and private messages asking me to give everyone a heads up about where the story is headed. So this is it!

Once more again for anyone not paying attention:

**I am about to drop a major spoiler so stop reading now if you don't want to know before you keep reading the story. **

Okay, if you're still reading after that then it is your fault and you cannot blame me for giving away the ending.

I have read so many stories about Tony and Ziva's reunion and it's been so great to see everyone own take on how they would have liked it to happen! But, as mentioned, they all seem to stick to the one theme - tony and Ziva falling so seamlessly together! As much as I love Tiva (hence the name) I wanted to play around with the idea of things not working out so easily for them - because, let's be honest, nothing in their relationship was what I would class as easy.

In this story, Tony and Ziva will not be together in the end. But I promise, for those who stick around, I will be adding as many tiva moments as I can because I love them so much. And I plan on ending on a very positive note.

To those of you who continue to read - thank you. I appreciate all the feedback and messages.


	10. Chapter 10

Ziva sat on the park bench outside the Navy yard, nervously awaiting Tony's arrival. He hadn't said much when he called her - just that he wanted to meet as soon as possible to talk. She assumed that he would be coming alone. He had requested she allow him the weekend to talk to Tali and it was only Sunday morning. She looked around, taking in her surroundings. The sun was warm on her face, soaking into her skin. She closed her eyes, allowing herself a moment to enjoy the heat.

"It's a beautiful day." Tony's voice brought her out of her thoughts. Her eyes shot open, meeting his in an instant.

"Yes it is." She replied with a smile. "How are you?" She asked as he sat on the bench beside her.

"I'm good." He thought out loud, handing her a folded piece of paper. "Tali wanted you to have this."

She unfolded the page carefully. She looked across the page, taking in the colours and lines. She could clearly make out the image - two people holding hands. Along the bottom of the page, in adorably messy handwriting, were the words 'Ima and Tali' written one crayon. Ziva closed her eyes and allowed a few tears to roll down her cheeks. After a few seconds, she wiped them away, took a deep breath and gathered herself.

"Is she okay?" She asked, not knowing if she wanted the truth or a polite 'yes'.

"She's fine, actually." Tony sounded almost as surprised as Ziva felt. "She wants to know if you got sent back in an envelope, like Mr. Squeak, or if you had to have a box." He laughed a little, at the thought.

"May I ask who Mr. Squeak is?"

"A toy. A bright pink velvet ferret." Tony laughed again, a little harder this time, at the memory of his daughter carrying the ferret around wherever they went. "It really was a matter of love at first sight. She was obsessed with it - we couldn't go anywhere without it - until one day he disappeared. It turns out she tucked him into Senior's suitcase and Mr. Squeak ended up coming all the way to Washington with him. Once Senior found him, he was posted back in an express envelope."

"A ferret?"

"Yes. A velvet one, at that."

They both laughed.

"She seems to be handling the news well. But I'd still like to hold off on you seeing her, if that's alright with you."

"You do whatever you feel necessary, Tony. I trust your judgement." Ziva wanted nothing more than to hold her baby girl again. To brush her hair and tell her she was so very loved. But she knew she had to work her way back into Tali's life at Tali's pace.

"I don't want you to think I am being cruel."

"Not at all, Tony." She, very cautiously, placed her hand atop of his leg. "I do not want you to feel like you have to rush anything for my benefit. I have waited this long, I am willing to wait as long as I have to. I do not want anything to be forced upon anyone." Her words, a double entendres.

Tony took her hand, removing it from his leg, entwining it with his own. He had done this before, and it felt just as risky as it did before. But now the risk wasn't just getting caught. Now, there was real risk - risk of getting very hurt. Or worse, Tali getting hurt. Tony's mind was too much of a mess to risk sending mixed signals. He pulled his hand away, wiping it along his thigh as if he had touched something sticky and was trying to get all traces of 'ick' off of his skin.

Ziva could tell that Tony was conflicted. He had mentioned he was seeing someone, and from the little bit of information she managed to get out of McGee, things seemed to be going well between the two of them. She didn't want to come between them, not if Tony was truely happy. But she would be lying if she said the thought of another woman being in her daughters life did not bother her.

"This is all very confusing. I don't know how you seem so sure of how you feel." Tony's words were barely audible, just loud enough for her to hear. In Tony's mind, they offered her the explanation she most likely needed for his on and off behaviour. Ziva waited for Tony to make eye contact before she spoke.

"It is different for me, Tony. I have spent years with only one goal - finding my way back to Tali and, I guess in a perfect world, you. I would tell myself every single morning and every single night that I was going to see you both again. Not only see you but hold you, kiss you... love you." She blinked away the wet emotion filling her eyes and looked to the ground. "You had to learn to live without the possibility of ever seeing me again. You had to set goals for Tali to live a fulfilling life without me. Any planning for future that you have done, you have done so for a future without me. And now you have to undo all of that. For Tali, it may be easy now but she will eventually have to process these big emotions. But the thing about adults is, we cannot do that. We cannot compartmentalise like that because we are all too aware of the consequences of not doing so effectively. We are burdened by our life experience."

"You will to bear with me while I try to figure out what exactly it is I'm feeling?"

"Of course, Tony. Whatever you need, I am here."

"I appreciate that. I know it's a lot to ask..."

"It really is not - not after what I have put you through."

That anger in the pit of Tony's stomach began to stir again. She was right - asking her to be patient while he dealt with the consequences of her actions. He was hating this roller coaster he seemed to be on. He looked at Ziva, who was still focussing her gaze on the grass in front of them. Seeing her again, within arms reach of him made everything else seem irrelevant. He had missed her for so long. She was right; in a perfect world maybe they could find their way back to each other without the complications. Suddenly he felt a twinge in his chest. Guilt. Is that how he really felt? Did he think of Katie as one of these complications? He rubbed his temples, he could feel a tension migraine brewing behind his eyes.

"Have you talked to her?" It was almost as if she could read his mind.

"Not yet. Soon."

"Can you...can you tell me about her?" Ziva's stomach flipped. She wanted to know everything about the woman - but at the same time she wanted to stay in denial.

"I guess. I mean, is that really what you want?"

"If she's spending time with Tali then, yes, I would like to know about her."

"That is a fair point. Is there anything in particular you want to know?" Ziva shook pher head, so he continued. "Okay, well first of all I just want to say that Katie hasn't spent that much time with Tali so you don't have to worry about her influence over her. They've met a handful of times, only fairly short interactions. Tali does like her but she likes everyone so don't read into that at all. She is originally from Australia - she has the full accent and everything. Most of what she says is some sort of Aussie slang that I don't understand but she is slowly teaching me what it all means. And she is a travel blogger so she's never really around for long. She gets to fly all around the world, no permanent residence, never in one place for more than a few weeks."

"Does that make it hard to be in a relationship with her? I mean, how often do you actually get to see her?"

"She comes back to Paris more and more. When we first met I only saw her every few months, but now she visits in between each trip so I get to see her every other week."

"How long have you been seeing each other?" Ziva tried to ignore the slight smile on Tony's face as he talked about Katie.

"It's been a little over two years now." Ziva was shocked to learn how long this woman had been in his life. "It's more just a companionship thing, though. She is too busy with her career to be looking to settle down and I don't need someone coming into our life trying to act like a parent to Tali. We both get what we need from each other but that's really all it is."

"You do not have to play it down for me, Tony. If you have found someone, I am happy for you. Please just be honest with me so that I can work through this too."

"Honestly, Zee. I really don't know what to tell you. If someone had asked me a few days ago, I probably would have said that I can see a future with her. But, I mean, it wasn't that long ago that I thought you were my future. So many nights I dreamt about you, me and Tali - together as an actual, functioning family. Clearly, I still care for you." He reached out and grabbed her hand again. He found her touch familiar and comforting. "I just don't think she was some sort of consolation prize."

The words pained Ziva, but she understood. "Talk to her. See if that brings you any sort of clarity. No matter what you decide, you and I will make things work. You, Tali and myself can be an actual, almost functioning family without you and I being together. Like I said, I do not want to force anything." She gave his hand a slight squeeze before letting go. "I am sorry, I must go."

She rose from the bench and began to walk away. Reality had sunk in - Tony DiNozzo, whether he accepted it or not, was in love with another woman. She had never expected him to have not moved on, but for Tony to fall in love? That was definitely not something she had anticipated. But, at least Tali seemed to be coping alright, for now. Soon, hopefully, she would get to see the daughter she was forced to leave behind. She could not wait to hold her in her arms again. That was something no one could take away from her.


	11. Chapter 11

She chose to walked up the stairs, rather than take the elevator. She had been so excited to get to this very moment, but now she felt time needed to slow down... just for a moment. She had made it up four flights of stairs so far... maybe this wasn't the best choice. The penthouse Tony was renting for himself, Tali and Senior was the eleventh floor. Two more flights of stairs... she was more than half way there. Her breathing became short and heavy... usually she could sprint this amount of stairs, she shouldn't be struggling to breathe - especially at the leisurely pace she had been walking. Her vision began to blur and suddenly the world around her felt like it was spinning...her stomach tightened as she gripped the railing for support. Since Sahar had been taken out, her anxiety had stayed pretty much at bay. She pushed through another flight of stairs before she had to sit down. She reached into her pocket and pulled out the handkerchief that held a few small pills in it. _You don't need to be on alert anymore_, she thought to herself. She picked up one of the pills and tucked the rest back into her pocket. Holding the pill between her thumb and finger, she rolled it to examine it while she contemplated. _Tali needs you to be strong_. She closed her eyes and focussed solely on her breathing. Slow, purposeful breaths - in and out.

In.

And out.

After a few minutes she pulled the handkerchief out of her pocket, placed the pill back inside and carefully folded it again. For now, she was okay. She placed in back into her pocket - it was nice to know that help was _right there _if she needed it. The medication was more a comfort than a necessity. She had only taken it half a dozen times over the years - but in those moments she had been eternally grateful to Adam for procuring them for her. She would spend the rest of her life, knowing she owed it all to him.

She rose from the step she had been sitting on and continued up the stairs. When she reached the top, she took another deep breath - this was it. She existed the stairwell and found herself in a small foyer-like room. Directly across the room from her was the private elevator that would take her directly into the living room of the penthouse. Tony had given her the access code, but she opted to ring the buzzer instead.

"Hello?" Senior's voice was something she never thought she had missed, until now.

"I-it's Ziva." She stumbled, noting her voice was still shaky for her anxiety attack in the stairwell. The speaker went silent and the light above the elevator lit up. Seconds passed in silence before the elevator 'dinged' and the doors opened to reveal Senior standing there, arms open and smile plastered on his face.

"You have been missed." He said, before walking forward and wrapping his arms around her. She sunk into his embrace and rested her arms around his waist. "We have one very excited little girl upstairs."

She broke away from his arms and looked him in the eye. "She is not very _little _anymore from the photos Tony has shown me." She joked, despite the gnawing pain from missing her daughter growing up being a constantly present thing.

"Right. She is a beautiful young lady... who reminds me every day of her mother." They smiled softly at each other, enjoying the tender moment for a little while before walking into the elevator together. "I'll let you, when you're ready." He motioned to which button to press. Ziva inhaled deeply, before reaching forward and hitting the button.

The elevator doors opened and Ziva was instantly hit with the devine smell of Tony's famous lasagna.

"_**You did not have to cook for me, Tony. You are the guest in **_**my **_**house... I should be cooking for you." **_

"_**It is the least I can do. It's not like you were expecting me to casually drop by after you moved five-or-so thousand miles away."**_

"_**Well... I did invite you..."**_

"You feeling okay, Ziva?" Senior asked, bringing Ziva back to reality.

"I am fine."

"Just thinking about the last time I cooked for you?" Ziva peered over Senior's shoulder to see Tony leaning against the kitchen bench. She smiled and nodded. "Me too." He admitted.

Tony began to walk toward Ziva, and Senior took that as his cue to leave the room. Ziva stepped forward and wrapped Tony in a hug that would rival one of Abby's best.

"Have I apologised for that night?" She whispered into his chest.

"Never apologise for that night." He whispered back to her. He breathed her in, and for a moment he forgot everything else. He could feel her begin to pull away and he wanted nothing more than to hold her tighter, but reluctantly he let her go. He looked deep into her eyes and reached his hand out for her. "You ready?"

She nodded, grabbing his hand and allowing him to lead her across the living area. Down a small hallway was a door, partially open. Tony let go of Ziva's hand, using it to knock gently on the door.

"Tali, Ima is here. Are you ready?"

"Yes, daddy." A sweet voice said softly, but surely. Ziva's heart began to beat quickly. Her stomach flipped, over and over. She took a few steps forward, until she could see into the room. There stood the most perfect child she had ever seen - her Tali. Tali smiled, big, and Ziva could see the recognition in her eyes. Ziva had feared that after all this time, her daughter would not recognise her - that she would be a stranger.

"Hello, Ima."

With that, Ziva took a breath that she had not realised she was holding on to.

"Hello, Tali." She tried to contain the emotion but she could not help but well up. Her vision blurred ever so slightly from the tears, but she managed to keep them at bay.

Tali walked up to her mother and hugged her waist. Ziva lowered herself so that she was eye level with Tali. "I have missed you, very much."

"I missed you too. Where did you go?"

Ziva looked to Tony, unsure of how much he had told Tali. She knew that he had said she was lost... Tony gave her an encouraging nod of the head.

"I have actually been to quite a few places..."

"Were you trying to find us?" Tali interrupted.

"I wanted very much to come home to you."

"Daddy said if I ever get lost I should stay right where I am and he will come find me. If you stayed where you were, we could have found you and brought you home again."

"That is a good idea. I wish I had done that. But I am home now, and I will try my very hardest not to get lost again because I missed you so much." Ziva gently pulled Tali in and hugged her. She held onto her daughter tightly. She never wanted to have to say goodbye again.

"I love you, Ima." Tali whispered softly into Ziva's ear. For a short moment Ziva was not sure if the words had actually been spoken, or if she had simply imagined them. They were words she had never heard before - Tali was too young when they had to part - but it was something she definitely could get used to. When Tali pulled away from Ziva's embrace, looking her in the eye with a warm smile, Ziva knew her ears were not playing tricks on her.

"I love you too, Tali."


	12. Chapter 12

Tony could not have been more pleased with how dinner had gone. He had been rather nervous about the whole thing. Tali seemed to be handling everything like a total champion. She was adjusting to Ziva's presence relatively easy... a lot easier than Tony had been, anyway. She did have the occasional question, but for the most part she was just happy to have her Ima back. He wanted to let his daughter know that it was okay to not be okay... but he did not want to plant the seeds if they weren't already there. This parenting thing was turning out to be a lot more complicated than he thought.

He would be lying if he said he wasn't painting a very pretty picture in his head - the four of them (Ziva, Tali, Senior and himself) sitting around the dinner table, enjoying a meal and sharing stories of good times - exactly what he had always imagined the perfect family would be. Was it naive to think that this happily ever after could actually be within reach? Or was it simply his pessimism telling him that it was not possible?

His thoughts were interrupted when his cellphone began to vibrate lightly on the bedside table. It was 0530, he hadn't received phone calls this early in the morning since his days at NCIS. He answered, without checking the caller ID.

"Tony." He stated to whoever was on the other end of the line.

"What are you wearing?" The voice on the other end was sultry, before a giggle broke the character.

"Katie?"

"You sound tired... did I wake you?" Her voice changed rather quickly, more concerned now.

"No, I was awake. Just not expecting phone calls. Everything okay?"

"Everything is fine, I just wanted to give you a quick call. I know you were going to meet me in New York on Thursday but my schedule has changed... in about 5 minutes I'm boarding a plane to LA and I've got a few days to kill so I was wondering if it was okay if I flew out to you and crashed for a bit? I know you've got Tali with you so don't feel like you have to say yes! But I've been looking forward to seeing you so I want to try and get to Washington."

"That is fine." Tony said before thinking it through. Was having Katie in Washington a good idea right now?

"Perfect." Katie continued, excitedly. "I will call you when I land in LA."

"Perfect," Tony agreed halfheartedly. Katie hung up on her end and Tony followed. Placing the phone back on the bedside table, he shrunk down as far as he could in the bed and covered his head with the blankets.

Once again, he was conflicted. He had been excited to travel to New York to see Katie. To be together in their own little world, spending quality time together before he had to shake things up for them. But bringing her to the centre of it all... he was going to have to be upfront and honest right away. No perfect little New York bubble to save him.

"Daddyyyyy!" Tali squealed as she flew through his bedroom door and launched herself onto the end of the bed.

"Hey kiddo." Tony greeted her, pulling her up front the end of the bed and tucking her into the blankets beside him. She cuddled up beside him and before long, she was fast asleep again. Tony definitely wasn't going to complain about the extra time to rest before having to switch into dad mode.

Senior poked his head through the partially open door. Tony slightly moved the blankets, so that the peacefully sleeping Tali was visible to his father, and smiled a sleepy smile. Senior left and Tony shut his eyes, allowing himself to nod off for a little while.

Twenty minutes or so had passed before Tony's eyes opened again. He felt a lot more refreshed after that twenty minutes of extra sleep than he did after waking from his seven hour on-and-off sleep last night. His body really was not adjusting to this new, stress-induced sleep schedule. He gently removed his arm from underneath Tali's back and slid out of bed, careful not to wake her. Walking to the kitchen, he noticed a note on the dining table. Senior had several meetings this morning.

"What's that?" Tali asked, peeking out from the bedroom, rubbing her eyes. Tony must have woken her when he left.

"A note from Pa. It's going to be just us today, kiddo. What do you want to do?" Tali shrugged as she walked over to him and sat at the table. He pulled out the chair in front of him and lowered himself into it. "Okay, do you feel outdoorsy today or do you want to do something indoors?"

"Outdoorsy."

"Okay... how about, after breakfast, we go for a little hike in rock creek?"

Tali nodded excitedly before getting up and getting herself a bowl of cereal from the kitchen. Tony watched on, proud of how independent his little girl was getting. It is a bittersweet thing for a parent to see their child no longer needing their help with simple tasks. He could only imagine how seeing something like this would make Ziva feel. Maybe he should call her? Ask if she wanted to join them, maybe. She always did enjoy a good hike. Tali brought her bowl back over to the table, sitting back where she was previously seated.

"Daddy can you please help me pour the milk?"

He retrieved the carton of milk from the refrigerator. "Tell me when..." he said as he began to pour.

"That's enough, thank you."

"Would you like me to see if anyone is available to join us today or do you want it to be just us?"

"Can Ima come with us?"

Tony touched her hand softly and smiled encouragingly. Honestly, he was glad she was allowing Ziva back into her life so easily. It certainly did help with his recent anger issues toward the woman he spent many nights praying would one day return.

"I will call her and see if she is free this morning."

Ziva was already at NCIS headquarters when Tony rang her. She, along with Gibbs and his team, had come in bright and early after Sloane had found something in relation to Adam's possible whereabouts. The chime of her phone had brought the team to a sudden holt and all eyes were on her. She looked at the ID on the phone screen.

"Sorry," she said, before answering the call. "Is everything okay?" She asked.

"Do I continue?" Bishop quietly asked Gibbs, knowing the presentation she was currently making her way through was mainly for Ziva's benefit. Gibbs didn't have to say anything... one of his infamous stares gave her all she needed to know. So, patiently, the team waited.

"Tony... I can't right now. Please, please tell Tali how very sorry I am... and as soon as I am done I will do something special with her. This is important, I promise you. You know, if it was not, I would be there in a heartbeat."

"Go." Gibbs said, overhearing the conversation.

"Hold on." Ziva said to Tony, then moved the phone away from her ear slightly. "What do you mean 'go'? I have work to do here."

"Well, actually, there is still a lot we need to do on our end before anyone can do anything. Sloane is following up with her sources and we need to find enough evidence for a warrant. There really isn't that much that you can do to help right now." Bishop informed her.

"We've got this part covered, you go spend time with your daughter." Gibbs pushed. He, more than anyone, understood how desperately Ziva needed to be with her family right now. To go so many years without the loving touch of your child's hand... without the goodnight stories and good morning cuddles... "Go." He said once more, this time it was more of an order, before turning and heading toward Sloane's office.

Ziva moved her focus to Bishop. "Thank you." Was all she said before heading to the elevator. "I'll be there." She said to Tony before hanging up the phone.

Did she feel guilty, as if she was slacking and letting Gibbs and the team do the work she should have been doing? Definitely. But if Eleanor was telling the truth, then there really wasn't anything she could do to help them right now. She was not an agent and her sources had run dry weeks ago. If she wasn't going to be any help to the team, then she may as well be working on her relationship with her daughter. There was no point in disappointing her when it was not necessary. God knows she has had enough of that, already. Ziva was increasingly concerned for her good friend's safety. But for now, she would swallow that fear and wear a smile on her face - her daughter would not feel like she was anything less than Ziva's top priority.


	13. Chapter 13

**Hey hey! Thanks for the love guys. Lots of new people have started following me as an author and honestly I cannot put into words how much that means to me! I'm glad you enjoy my writing. I've put up a new story - it's going to be a compilation of TIVA one shots for those of you who live and breathe all things TIVA! **

**I just wanted to quickly explain why I'm not writing a whole lot of 'Tali' stuff. Like, she's there but she's not saying much and that's purely because NCIS didn't really develop her character much (because she was just a baby when she was on the show) and I don't want to develop a character that you guys would potentially not like - because if we are being honest, any TIVA child is amazing! and to not write her to her potential would be devastating for me. **

The hike went relatively smooth. Tali was, as expected, very excited to see that Ziva was able to join them. So excited, in fact, she and Ziva talked and joked throughout the entire hike - much to Tony's relief. You see, Tony was not interested in exchanging pleasantries. Instead, he spent most of the hike examining the trail map. The trails were marked out with coloured flags... but you could never be too safe, right? He wondered if Ziva would pick up on his frustration. Of course she would - she always had been able to sense even the slightest frustration with him, why would now be any different? Oh right... because it had been years since they had spoken... because she stayed in Israel when she should have come home with him... because she cut off all contact with him, because that was apparently easier than telling him she was having his child... because she let everyone that ever cared for her - loved her - believe that she was dead. He didn't have much experience with situations like this but he assumed it would put a strain on deeper connections, similar to the one he and Ziva had once shared. He peeled his eyes from the map occasionally to check on his daughter but couldn't stop his eyes from drifting from Tali to Ziva. Yes, she had definitely picked up on his frustration. But she hadn't said anything.

After the hike, they went back to the suite. The original plan was to have lunch together, but Tali had fallen asleep in the car almost as soon as they started driving. Once he had Tali tucked into her bed, he walked out to find Ziva standing awkwardly by the door.

"Were you going to sit down or were you just going to stand there all day?" He unintentionally snarled at her, grabbing two bottles of water from the fridge and placing one on the kitchen bench before opening the other and taking a sip.

She let a puff of air slip through her lips, as if he had said something slightly humorous. "I just have the gnawing feeling that I am not actually welcome here right now."

"You're always welcome. We _are _family, after all." He didn't mean for his words to sound so bitter, yet here they were... sounding _extremely _bitter.

"Yes, Tony. We are. Which means we actually talk to each other about whatever it is that is going on right now."

"Ha!" He nearly choked on the sip of water he took. "Since when did either of our families actually talk to each other about anything?" He could see by the look on her face that he had taken this too far. In fact, he didn't even have to see the look on her face - he knew the second the words spilled out of his mouth that he had taken it too far. Their dysfunction families were probably Ziva's biggest reason to try and raise Tali alone. Heaven knows all her family did for her was bring her pain.

Ziva simply nodded, not having the energy right now to argue with him. She turned to leave but the softer, gentler, more caring voice she had relied on so many times broke through and made her stop.

"I don't know how to do this. I can't just be happy to be around you all the time. I know that sucks and I hate myself for it but I am trying."

"I know you are and I appreciate it." She turned to face him again. "But I didn't ask to come today, you invited me to join you."

"Yeah and apparently you might have had a better offer?"

The quick remark confirmed to Ziva that this encounter was due to their phone call earlier this morning. "There are no 'better offers', Tony. Nothing is better than being able to spend time with Tali."

"But something seemed more important."

"Not more important, either. This... thing, that NCIS is helping me with... it is time sensitive." She walked closer to him, it wanting to be talking across the room anymore.

"You said this was all over. Tali is here because _you _said it was safer now. If this isn't over yet -"

"It is, I promise." She interrupted.

Tony had told himself over and over again that he did not need the details... that they didn't matter. But it was becoming more and more apparent that he did. He took a deep breath, "Then what the hell is going on?"

"We are trying to find Adam."

"Adam Eshal? Why? Is he part of all this?"

Ziva reached out and took hold of Tony's hand, leading him to the couch. Together, they sat and talked for over an hour. She explained everything, from Sahar's connections to her half-brother, to Adam working his way into the local cell and how she had ultimately risked Adam's life to save Gibbs. She spoke of her guilt, how so many of the choices she had made continued to keep her up at night. And how Tali was the only thing helping her through each day.

"I wish I could've helped you." Tony managed to say, despite the confusion of a million thoughts running through his mind. Things were definitely complicated - which he had never doubted, but hearing it firsthand was something else.

"There was nothing you could do, Tony. You helped by keeping Tali safe. I missed her, so much, but I knew that as long as she was with you she would be safe. That was one less thing I was worrying about. You helped more than you will ever realise."

He put his arm around her shoulders and she let her head fall and rest on him. These small moments were comforting and gave Ziva that feeling of familiarity that she so desperately needed.

But when things were quiet... when things were calm... that was when her demons seemed to come out of hiding.

Without warning, her mind began to race in a direction she had hoped to avoid while she was in the presence of her little family. Dark thoughts fought their way through the clutter of her mind and her body reacted involuntarily.

"Are you okay?" Tony asked, noting the way Ziva's breathing had become shallow and uneven. Out of the corner of his eye he saw her wipe a tear from her cheek. He turned into her slightly and gently lifted her head from his shoulder. "Ziva...?"

"I am okay, Tony." She lied, frantically trying to pull herself together.

"You're home now." He said calmly, pulling her into his chest. She breathed him in, letting the familiar scent of his cologne ground her. "It's okay, we've got you. You're home."


	14. Chapter 14 (fixed it)

Tony was restless that night. Hearing Ziva's accounts of these passed years, and seeing firsthand the power those memories still had over her, was something he wasn't quite sure how to move forward with. A big part of him - a part bigger than he thought he could admit right now - wanted to hold her, tell her everything would be okay and then never let her go.

As he rolled onto his side for, what felt like the hundredth time in the short time he'd been in bed, he tried to think of anything else... but he couldn't. He closed her eyes and all he could see was her face. All he could smell was the scent of her hair when she had rested her head on his shoulder. He allowed his mind to wander momentarily. The scent in his mind was almost vivid enough for him to imagine Ziva laying in his bed beside him. He remembered back to the last time he shared a bed with her - how natural it felt to hold her body against his. He felt a stir in his stomach and a flood of emotion filled his entire body. Love, sadness, hate, lust. He needed to occupy his mind with something else - anything else. How was it that he was still no closer to sorting through all these feelings toward her.

He rolled out to his other side and looked at the radio alarm clock on the bedside table. Unknowingly, he had allowed hours to pass while Ziva consumed his thoughts. He was not sure if that was a good sign or not. But, generally, if he was still awake into the early hours of the morning thinking of a woman, it was not because he hated her. His phone vibrated against the glass top of the bedside table.

"Tony." He whispered into the phone.

"Sorry, did I wake you?"

"No, I'm awake." She stated, slightly frustrated by the fact.

"I just wanted to let you know that I'm coming up the street."

Shit! How had he forgotten Katie was arriving this morning? He shot up and practically leaped out of bed. "Perfecting timing!" He exclaimed, trying to hide the slight changes in his voice that she would more than likely pick up on anyway. "I'll meet you down in the lobby."

"Perfect." She agreed, before ending the call.

He tossed his phone on his bed and frantically searched for a shirt to throw over his bare chest. He considered changing the sweatpants he was currently wearing, but figured at 3am his chances of running into anyone were pretty slim. Grabbing his phone and security keycard, he headed down to the lobby.

The elevator ride was quick and quiet. He had become very used to having a tiny voice asking an endless stream of questions by his side the majority of the time, so any time without it seemed almost eerie. He arrived in the lobby only moments before a silver Prius pulled up right out front and he bubbly redhead he had become close with got out of the back seat, bag in hand, and gave the driver a friendly wave goodbye. The sight made Tony smile. He had missed Katie... he always did. Then, that familiar twinge hit his stomach, wiping that smile away quicker than it had appeared. He hit the button to open the doors to the lobby and the sudden movement brought the woman's attention to the man standing inside. Her smile grew even larger than he thought was humanly possible as she took a few steps forward. His smile appeared again and she flung herself into his arms. She smelled like Aloe Vera and he noted her upper arms were sporting a slight burn - he had come to expect this whenever she returned from her homeland. Her mother's family originated in Scotland and the only obvious genetic traits she inherited from her indigenous father was that, in a day or two, that burn on her arms would turn into a light tan.

"I've missed you." She stayed, as she moved her body from within his grasp, and looked deep into his eyes. Her blue eyes always seemed to pierce right into his soul. After a moment she placed her palm on his right cheek and leaned in, placing a gentle kiss on the left corner of his mouth. She knew something was off. Tony let out a deep breath and wrapped his arms around her body tighter than he had before. After a few moments, he reached down and grabbed the bag from her hand, then lead her to the elevator that would take them to their temporary home.

When they got to the top floor, he lead her into the living room. The couch was not made up with sheets and a pillow. He placed her duffel bag in the master bedroom. She took that as a good sign, despite his unusual quietness.

"I wasn't expecting you to be in the States." She said. He knew the statement was supposed to encourage him to explain, but he wasn't ready to get into that yet. Not at this time of morning.

"Yeah. Me neither." He tried to laugh off, coming back into the living room after dumping her bag on the luggage stand in his room. He saw the concern in her eyes. "Also... I have missed you too. You have no idea how much." He walked over to her and snaked his arms around her waist, giving her the best smile he could summon at the moment in time. It seemed to be enough, for now, and she smiled back.

"He brought his head forward slightly, inviting her to close the gap between their lips. She did so, without hesitation. He had almost forgotten how soft her lips felt against his. Her lips had been one of the first things he noticed about her, that day in the museum. They were full and curved up, ever so slightly, in the corners. The old Tony would have been instantly curious as to how her lips would have felt against his... the new Tony was also curious about this, but significantly less forward with such curiosities. She smiled against his lips and he couldn't help but wonder what she was thinking. It was only then that he noticed exactly what had made her smile. His thoughts about how he was instantly attracted to her had sparked a feeling of joy that his body had no intention of hiding. Feeling slightly embarrassed, he shifted back slightly so that she could no longer feel him against her.

"No need to be shy, Tony." She almost purred... a sound Tony would usually enjoy.

"Me? Shy?" He joked, grabbing her hands and leading her into his bedroom. "I am not shy. Just tired and Tali will be awake in just a few hours. It kills me to say this, but I need to sleep."

She pouted playfully. "Well, if you change your mind..." she drifted off, grabbing the clean towel Tony had been laced on her bag and walked into the en-suite, moving her hips teasingly.

Tony got back into bed, praying his excitement would ease. But as he heard the shower starting, his thought began to drift. The woman he was seeing was just a few strides away, naked and inviting him to join her. He closed his eyes and tried to will himself to sleep, but after a few unsuccessful minutes, he gave in to his primal urges.

She was considering turning the shower off and slipping into bed, accepting that nothing was going to happen - not tonight. But right as she finished rinsing the conditioner out of her hair, she heard the click of the bathroom door shutting. She smiled, and within seconds she felt his presence behind her. This was exactly how she had planned their reunion.


	15. 15(fixed)

**Thank you for your patience while I fixed up these chapters. Sorry about the file corruption! **

**Enjoy. **

Tony woke up feeling better than he had felt in weeks. He could feel Katie's steady breath on his chest and his hand rose ever so slightly each time she inhaled. Opening his eyes, all he could see was fiery hair spread across his chest. He gathered the hair in his hands as gently as possible, careful not to wake her, and made sure it was all brushed out of her face. He shifted his body and rested her head on the pillow. He was grateful she was a reasonably heavy sleeper - he would have never been able to do this with Ziva. The thought caught him off guard and his body tensed. Not only was he going to have to tell Katie everything today, with her being here it was more than likely Tony would see his two world collide - sooner rather than later. Would Katie be ready to meet Ziva? Was Ziva ready to meet Katie? Was Tony ready for any of this? He guessed he was going to find out.

He was surprised, when he entered the kitchen, to find that he was the only one awake. Quietly, he shuffled around the kitchen gathering what he needed to make breakfast. He started the machine to make a pot of coffee - he knew it wouldn't be long before he was joined by everyone else. A few minutes passed before he heard a soft creaking. He looked up to see Katie's head poking out from behind the bedroom door.

"Do I smell coffee?" She asked, sleepily.

"It should be ready, if you want some." He stated, continuing with his preparation of their next meal.

Katie shuffled across the living room and into the kitchen, grabbing two mugs and pouring the coffee into them. She took a sip, screwing up her face almost instantly.

"Forgot what the coffee here tastes like." She said before grabbing the carton of milk out of the fridge and pouring a small amount into her coffee.

"You mean good?" Tony joked, having had this conversation with her before.

"Sure... if that's what ya wanna call it." She sipped her coffee, much more satisfied by the taste now.

The room was filled with silence for a few minutes. It was not uncomfortable, yet Tony felt the need to fill it with something. He fiddled with his phone for a few seconds, connecting it to the Bluetooth speaker and playing some quiet music. He did not want to wake his family members.

"Thank you..." he started, gaining her attention. "You know... for last night."

She was surprised to see he seemed almost embarrassed talking about the encounter. "Not a problem. I had fun." She smiled, reassuringly. She gulped the last few mouthfuls of her coffee before speaking again. "I'm going to go get ready for the day, if you don't mind."

"Of course." He smiled before returning his focus to the ingredients in front of him. He looked at the omelette preparation in front of him, wondering if he had enough for four, when suddenly fear struck him.

What if Tali told Katie about Ziva before he had the chance to? Or what if Senior, unaware that she did not yet know, made a comment about the situation? Tony abandoned the eggs and fresh produce he had been dicing and rushed into his room. Katie, who had stripped down to just her underwear, jumped - startled by his sudden appearance.

"Round two?" She asked, flirtatiously raising an eyebrow.

"No." Tony answered abruptly. "Well, actually..." he thought for a moment, before remembering his panic and shaking his head 'no'.

"This might come out entirely the wrong way but can I please sneak you out of here before Tali sees you?" He was pleading, practically begging her.

"Okay, last night I was picking up on some kind of negative vibes and now you're trying to hide me from your daughter? Is there something going on that I should know about, Tony?" She crossed her arms in front of her and Tony couldn't help but notice how that pushed her brassier up, flaunting her cleavage. He also made sure to note how inappropriate that thought was.

"Look, I'm not going to lie to you."

"Good." She interrupted him.

"I know I've been sketchy and you have every right to doubt me right now but I promise I'm not trying to hide you from Tali. I just..." he tried to think of the best way to approach this. "I just want it to be you and me for a little bit, give us some times to talk before she wants all your attention on her. The kid has missed you - she's not going to want to share you."

"Wow. Don't I feel like the psycho girlfriend right now." She tried to laugh it off, but he could tell she felt silly.

"Don't feel like that. Yesterday was a rough day and I definitely wasn't feeling like myself when you arrived." He walked closer to her and placed a kiss on her collarbone. "Just know that I am sorry."

She smiled appreciatively before continuing to get ready for the day. Tony quickly threw on some casual clothes before sitting on the bed to scribble a quick note on a piece of paper. As they quietly left, he placed it on the kitchen bench.

They walked down the street until I came across a small cafe. They both ordered a smoothie to go - Tony was eager to rip this bandaid and be done with it. Once their order was ready, they continued to walk until the reached a small park. They sat quietly on a bench, sipping at their smoothies and taking in the scenery. When he thought she was as ready as she would be, he began to speak.

"I'm here because I was worried about Gibbs." He started, finally answering her technically unasked question from earlier. She listened intently, but knew to let him get out as much as he could before speaking up. "A few months ago I received a pretty cryptic message from him and then he started screening my calls. He'd never done that - not to me, anyway - so, I worried. Dad came to visit us so I took the opportunity, while I knew Tali would be taken care of, to come here and confront him face to face."

Tony hesitated, so Katie pressed for more information. "They are both here with you now. Had something happened to Gibbs?" She struggled to say the words aloud, knowing how his former boss being in any kind of trouble would absolutely crush Tony.

"Gibbs is fine." He took a deep breath, grabbing that metaphorical bandaid and preparing to rip. "He called me because... Ziva is alive." He struggled to make eye contact, but eventually forced himself to do so. Her eyes searched his face, seemingly hoping to find any sign that he was joking.

"Wha- how?" She looked away from his face, realising he wasn't playing some messed up prank on her. She, unable to properly express the overwhelming amount of emotions rushing through her, began to laugh.

"Am I missing the funny part?" He questioned, confused by her sudden outburst.

"I just -" she could barely get the words out through the laughter. She took a moment to pull herself together before continuing. "Please tell me you didn't let me fly her just to be broken up with? I mean... I'm a busy woman and I definitely could have handled this in a phone call." She laughed again.

"I don't plan on breaking up with you." He tried to reassure her.

"Come on, Tony. I'm not an idiot. You, yourself, have told me that you will always love her - that she was your soulmate" Her laughter was gone and now he could see the concern in her eyes.

"I stand by that. She is the mother of my child and I'll always have love for her. But she willingly kept my child a secret from me and I have recently discovered that I hold a lot of resentment because of that."

Katie's face softened, slightly ashamed that she was just now realising that if she had been overcome by so many strong emotions, she couldn't even begin to imagine how Tony felt upon receiving this news. She could see the hurt in Tony's eyes. She had seen it before - when they had first met - but it was something she hadn't seen in a while. She couldn't help but let her emotions out in the form of tears. She could feel his pain, radiating from him.

"This has been very confusing for me. I don't know what I am supposed to do or how I am supposed to feel. All I know is that I don't want to hurt you. I never want to hurt you, Katie. You don't deserve this. But I am scared to lose you." He reached out for her hand and she intertwined her fingers with his. He continued "which is why a big part of me is telling me not to tell you this."

She squeezed his hand gently. She worried where this was leading, but she had always encouraged his honesty. "I'm listening, Tony." She said, making her voice as steady as possible.

"I loved her, so much. More than I'd ever loved anyone. And seeing her when I thought I'd never see her again... I'm angry but I can still feel what was there. There's moments when the anger fades and I just want to hold her and tell her everything will be okay. And at first... when I wasn't expecting it... I kissed her. And, while nothing more happened, I can't promise you that I would have stopped there if she hadn't have stopped."

"Thank you for your honesty." She said in an almost robotic voice. She stood and began to walk away, before turning to Tony. "I'll be back." She turned again and walked along the path that circled the park.

"The park was only small so Tony could still see her, even when she was on the other side of the patch of trees. She stopped occasionally to look at flowers, children kicking around a ball or something else that was nothing in particular - but for the most part, she just walked. Once she had walked the full path and made her way back to the bench where Tony was still seated, she sat beside him and smiled warmly.

"Here's what is going to happen." She started, confidently. "Tomorrow night, I am flying out of Washington. Until then, I would really appreciate spending time with you and your family. That is, after all, why I am here. If you and Ziva are comfortable, I would like to meet her. I do not understand why, I guess it's morbid curiosity - I don't know. It's just something I feel like I need to do. When I leave, I want you to understand that I will be leaving as a single woman and therefore you will be a single man."

Tony shuffled toward her, intending on protesting her plan. But when she placed her hand firmly on his thigh, the same thing she had done many times in the past when she needed him to simply allow her to talk, he stopped.

"I love you, Tony. And I know that you love me too. But, like you said, this is all very confusing. You need the time - and the freedom - to figure this all out, without having to worry about me. I have an extremely busy few weeks of work ahead of me. I won't have time to scratch myself, let alone worry about what you may or may not be doing so don't you worry about that. While I'm gone, I think it's best if we have as little contact as possible. And when I'm done, I will come back. I hope that with the added pressure taken away, you'll gain some sort of clarity. Explore these feelings you have. I think that's the only way you'll be able to fully understand them."

"Why are you doing this?"

"Because... I know relationship like ours is special. Whether we make it through this stronger than before, or we go our separate ways... we are both better people for having loved each other. Right?" She held his hand and rose up from the bench, encouraging him to rise with her. "Besides, I'm feeling strangely confident at the moment and that surely is a sign!"

Together they walked back home. Tony hoped this wouldn't be the end of that particular conversation - but, for now, he was more than happy to be past what he hoped would be the hardest part of this journey.


	16. Chapter 16

The walk home had been nicer than he had expected. Katie wrapped her arm around his and placed her head on his shoulder as they walked together, taking in the scenery around them. He desperately wanted to know what thoughts were running through her mind, but he knew she would eventually share them with him. That was his favourite part of her radical honesty policy - he never had to wait too long to be let into her thoughts. When they got home, Tony exited the elevator first, scanning the room to see where his family was. Senior was in the kitchen, cleaning up the dishes from breakfast - from what Tony could see, it looked like he had found the prepped food Tony had left in the fridge. Tali was nowhere to be seen, but he could hear her gentle voice... she must have been playing in her room. Senior looked up from the dishes he had washed, dried and piled on the bench in front of him, making eye contact with his son. Before he had the chance to greet his son, he noticed someone else's presence in the elevator, but couldn't quite see who it was. Tony could see the curiosity on Senior's face.

"Hey Dad. You remember Katie, don't you?" He smiled, grabbing Katie's hand and encouraging her to move into sight.

"Of course!" Senior exclaimed, excitedly. It had been over twelve months since he had met the woman who had caught his son's attention, distracting him from the heartbreak he carried with him, but he remembered fondly how taken he was by her demeanour. He dried his dampened hands on a nearby hand towel, then walked around the kitchen island toward the couple. He held his hand out to shake hers, but she just smiled and wrapped her arms around him to hug him instead. He did not mind, at all.

"It is good to see you again, Mr DiNozzo." She said, pulling away from their friendly embrace.

"I do believe I told you not to call me that." He laughed. "Makes me feel old."

"Sorry, Anthony." She corrected.

"How is your family? Junior told me you've been visiting home for a little while." He placed his hand out, silently directing her to the couch. Together, the three of them sat and talked for a few minutes.

Once the polite small talk had seemingly come to an end, Tony rose and headed down the hall to his daughters bedroom. He poked his head through the door and watched her for a brief moment - sometimes it still amazed him that the little girl in front of him was actually his daughter. Everything she did made him prouder than he ever imagined he could be.

She noticed him watching her, and placed the crayon she had been eagerly scribbling with on the desk. "Hey Daddy." She smiled.

"Hey kiddo. Sorry I was gone when you woke up." He entered the room, moving to her bed and sitting down. He tapped his knee with his hand and she happily jumped up and sat on his lap, cuddling into his chest.

"That's okay. Were you with Ima?"

"No, baby." He kissed the top of her head, knowing she did not like being called his baby - she was, after all, a big girl now. But occasionally he just needed to hold onto the memory of her when she was his baby. "I have a surprise for you."

With that, she jumped off of his lap and turned to face him. Her eyes were wide with genuine excitement.

"A surprise!" She repeated. "For me?"

He couldn't help but chuckle at her excitement. He nodded and reached out his hand, waiting for her to place her own on it. When she did, he curled his fingers around her palm... her hand was so tiny in his. They exited the room, side by side, and after only a few steps, Tali could see her surprise.

"Katie!" She slipped her hand out from Tony's loosened grip and ran toward the visitor.

"Hey there, Chicken." Tony wasn't sure why Katie had given Tali that particular nickname, but Tali seemed to love it so he wasn't going to say anything. He watched on, smiling uncontrollably, as the two embraced each other in a warm hug. "I brought something very special from my family's home. I was wondering if maybe you could take care of it for me, while I'm travelling for work?"

Tali nodded enthusiastically, but stayed out when Katie left the room to retrieve whatever it was she was talking about. She returned from Tony's room holding what looked like a fluffy fur ball. Tali studies it, curious as to what it could be.

"Have you seen one of these before?" Katie asked, lowering herself to be at Tali's height. Tali shook her head. "He's a toy wombat. He was mine, when I was your age and I loved him very much. But now that I am a grown up and don't get to go home very often, he spends most of his time sitting on the shelf in my old bedroom. I think he must get pretty lonely there, what do you think?"

"It sounds lonely, to me." Tali agreed, reaching out to stroke the furry stuffed animal Katie was still nursing lovely in her arms, as if it were a real, live animal.

"When your daddy told me that you were here, and that we were going to be able to spend a little bit of time together, I thought to myself 'who better to keep my little friend company, than my little Chicken?' That is, if you want to."

"I have never taken care of a wombat before. I might need you to give me some tips to make sure he feels safe." Tali answered, taking the toy from Katie's arms and snuggling into him gently.

If Tony wasn't in love with this woman before, he sure was now. He knew it wasn't Katie's intentions... but knowing that she was so sweet with Tali, despite the fact that he had dropped a bombshell on her just this morning, was making her decision to redefine their relationship that much harder.

But he understood... kind of.


End file.
